Continuing to review this blog I notice that March – June of 2013 represents a significant shift in my thinking.
My research begins to split into two themes:
- Cultural queerness; and starting to wonder if “queer” is something which can be cultural as well as sexual.
- What are the consequences of uploading yourself to the internet?
In March of 2013, I had decided to travel to the Faux Queen Pageant later in the year and was starting my preparations. I can see that in March I had abandoned three “personas” which I thought I might develop on agorafauxbia.com. In retrospect, the persona “Night Night Trashy” formed the basis of Agorafauxbia’s personality which I would eventually present at the Faux Queen Pageant. The persona of Night Night Trashy was intended to draw on my favourite influences from female comedy, including French & Saunders and Kath & Kim. Additionally she was also intended to reflect and caricature childhood memories of women in my family.
April saw the first mention of a notion of cultural queerness. This may coincide with follow up interviews conducted with Tria Connell and Krista Smith, which specifically focused on notions of queerness. I begin to conceptualise what could be an aspect of “cultural queerness” linked with flamboyant dressing and consider that those items are relegated to a “dress up box”.
NOTE: Right now I’m drafting a piece of cabaret theatre which draws on some of the blog data, and a “dress up box” full of wigs and costumes appears onstage in most of the stage designs.
I think about social pressure to conform in various situations, the oppressive behaviours of situations which I have been in, and how those have affected the development of my personality.
In May I make the first mention of images online and start to be honest about the anxiety I experience when putting personal stories online for everyone to read. This was around the time when I started drafting an article for a conference which looks at the risks and rewards of using agorafauxbia.com. I started to get very focused on the notion of performativity online, and its implications. I was aware that my blog was “out there”, but the number of people actually reading it was low. This is when I came up the concept and plot for “Survival”, which you can watch on the screen work page. I was definitely starting to feel like having a website might be a tree falling in the woods kind of situation; if no one is reading it, does it really make an impact?
By June I was drafting two articles, which were vastly different. One was about notions of control and surrender when placing our images in online environments and the other was beginning to question existing concepts of queerness and wondering if straight faux queens could identify with a notion of cultural queerness.